If you’re planning to attend graduate or professional school, standard college advice will need to be modified to be relevant to you. Your path will require some specific combination of general academic preparation and fulfilling specific requirements, and the many different paths included in this category\u2014PhD, MD, JD, and MBA being a few of them\u2014are too varied for us to provide any specific recommendations here. Luckily, you don’t have to figure it out alone; the path you’re considering has likely been trod by many others before you, and they’ll have plenty of advice on how best to accomplish your goal. Start by consulting the internet for basic advice, then seek out the advice of others who have pursued the same path before you.<\/p>\n
After you acquire specialized advice, though, it may still be worth your time to try to incorporate the ideas we’re discussing here. The overarching themes we’re covering in this sequence\u2014thoughtful examination of motives and careful analysis of consequences\u2014will be relevant to you, regardless of your path. And the specific considerations about self-improvement and career preparation can be extended to your situation, as long as you’re willing to put in the effort to apply them. So, I recommend you continue reading this sequence and try to think about how the details of your desired graduate\/professional path will alter our recommendations.<\/p>\n
<\/a>Familial Expectations<\/h2>\nIs that what you want? Or is that what people expect of you?
\n\u2014Don Draper, Mad Men<\/em><\/p><\/blockquote>\nIf you’re one of the 35% of students who identify “pleasing family” as a very important factor in their decision to attend college, I’m going to forgo any attempt at objectivity and just talk straight with you: Think bigger. You only get one life, and you can’t let the desires of others overshadow your own interests and ambitions. It can be admirable to make decisions with an eye toward satisfying others, but remember you should be aiming to satisfy yourself too. If you surrender decision-making authority to others, don’t be surprised if things don’t turn out how you’d hoped.<\/p>\n
In general, parents have their children’s best interests at heart. However, the desires of the heart have to compete with other factors, many of which reside at the unconscious level. In an essay<\/a>, Computer Scientist Paul Graham says, “The advice of parents will tend to err on the side of money. . . .<\/span> All parents tend to be more conservative for their kids than they would for themselves, simply because, as parents, they share risks more than rewards.” While you may be willing to risk some financial hiccups for a shot at a satisfying life\/career, your parents’ judgement may be clouded by the fear of having to delay retirement to support you if you fail.<\/p>\nI think both sides have valid points, but that doesn’t mean you should let risk avoidance prevent you from ever aiming high in life. At the end of the day, you’re the one that’s going to have to take the classes and work the jobs, so it’s worth trying to do what you <\/em>think is your best bet. If you make your decisions for yourself, you’ll be able to celebrate successes and learn from failures knowing the decisions that guided you\u2014for better or worse\u2014were your own. That’s a goal worth fighting for.<\/p>\nThings get trickier if your ability to afford college depends on getting your family’s approval. If you’re in that situation and you’d like to try to convince your parents to think differently, try sharing the For Parents page<\/a> with them. It’s designed to bridge the gap in perspective between teens and adults, and it may help them better appreciate your opinion. Besides that, though, I don’t have any magical solutions for you. You’ll have to evaluate your options\u2014giving in to the desires of your family or pursuing your own path without financial support\u2014and make a difficult decision. Do what you think is best.<\/p>\n<\/a>Delaying Adulthood<\/h2>\nWhether by accident or by design, college can serve to delay the onset of adulthood. All the dreaded aspects of “adulting”\u2014paying bills, working a boring job, etc.\u2014can be delayed in a socially-acceptable manner by going to college. I can see the appeal: The Van Wilder <\/em>life looks like a lot more fun than the Office Space <\/em>life.<\/p>\n![\"Side-by-side](\"http:\/\/www.decidemymajor.dev.cc\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/Van-Wilder-vs-Office-Space.jpg\")
Van Wilder<\/em> (left) vs. Office Space<\/em> (right)<\/figcaption><\/figure>\nHowever, I don’t think that means you should devote your entire<\/em> college career to avoiding hard work and responsibility. If your only goal in college is to live it up, the rest of this sequence won’t be of much use for you. If you’re like most people and you want to pursue a balance of serious matters and<\/strong> fun times, this sequence is for you. We’ll be focusing on the serious stuff here, but know that there’s nothing wrong with enjoying your life as long as you make sure to keep things balanced.<\/p>\nOver the next few pages, we\u2019ll focus on evaluating the most common reasons for college: their advantages, their disadvantages, how well they hold up during economic recessions, etc. If you already are 100% certain of what you want out of college, you can skip ahead<\/a>. For everyone else, keep reading.<\/p>\n![\"Previous](\"http:\/\/www.decidemymajor.dev.cc\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/Left-Arrow.svg\")
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Is that what you want? Or is that what people expect of you? If you’re one of the 35% of students who identify “pleasing family” as a very important factor in their decision to attend college, I’m going to forgo any attempt at objectivity and just talk straight with you: Think bigger. You only get one life, and you can’t let the desires of others overshadow your own interests and ambitions. It can be admirable to make decisions with an eye toward satisfying others, but remember you should be aiming to satisfy yourself too. If you surrender decision-making authority to others, don’t be surprised if things don’t turn out how you’d hoped.<\/p>\n In general, parents have their children’s best interests at heart. However, the desires of the heart have to compete with other factors, many of which reside at the unconscious level. In an essay<\/a>, Computer Scientist Paul Graham says, “The advice of parents will tend to err on the side of money. . . .<\/span> All parents tend to be more conservative for their kids than they would for themselves, simply because, as parents, they share risks more than rewards.” While you may be willing to risk some financial hiccups for a shot at a satisfying life\/career, your parents’ judgement may be clouded by the fear of having to delay retirement to support you if you fail.<\/p>\n I think both sides have valid points, but that doesn’t mean you should let risk avoidance prevent you from ever aiming high in life. At the end of the day, you’re the one that’s going to have to take the classes and work the jobs, so it’s worth trying to do what you <\/em>think is your best bet. If you make your decisions for yourself, you’ll be able to celebrate successes and learn from failures knowing the decisions that guided you\u2014for better or worse\u2014were your own. That’s a goal worth fighting for.<\/p>\n Things get trickier if your ability to afford college depends on getting your family’s approval. If you’re in that situation and you’d like to try to convince your parents to think differently, try sharing the For Parents page<\/a> with them. It’s designed to bridge the gap in perspective between teens and adults, and it may help them better appreciate your opinion. Besides that, though, I don’t have any magical solutions for you. You’ll have to evaluate your options\u2014giving in to the desires of your family or pursuing your own path without financial support\u2014and make a difficult decision. Do what you think is best.<\/p>\n Whether by accident or by design, college can serve to delay the onset of adulthood. All the dreaded aspects of “adulting”\u2014paying bills, working a boring job, etc.\u2014can be delayed in a socially-acceptable manner by going to college. I can see the appeal: The Van Wilder <\/em>life looks like a lot more fun than the Office Space <\/em>life.<\/p>\n However, I don’t think that means you should devote your entire<\/em> college career to avoiding hard work and responsibility. If your only goal in college is to live it up, the rest of this sequence won’t be of much use for you. If you’re like most people and you want to pursue a balance of serious matters and<\/strong> fun times, this sequence is for you. We’ll be focusing on the serious stuff here, but know that there’s nothing wrong with enjoying your life as long as you make sure to keep things balanced.<\/p>\n Over the next few pages, we\u2019ll focus on evaluating the most common reasons for college: their advantages, their disadvantages, how well they hold up during economic recessions, etc. If you already are 100% certain of what you want out of college, you can skip ahead<\/a>. For everyone else, keep reading.<\/p>\n
\n\u2014Don Draper, Mad Men<\/em><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<\/a>Delaying Adulthood<\/h2>\n
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